The balance of truth and love

Today we're going to finish our whole Bible study series by studying both books of 2nd and 3rd John together. Hopefully 2nd and 3rd John are going to help us to apply the truth that we learned in 1st John. My guess is that in this room probably few or none of you have studied the books of 2nd and 3rd John in a women's Bible study because it's not on the normal circuit of the type of books that we study in women's Bible studies. So this is a really special and important opportunity for us to do this, particularly on the heels of 1st John. These are the shortest books in the whole Bible. 2nd John is shortest in number of verses with only 13 verses, 3rd John gets the blue ribbon for only 301 words, the shortest in that. And 2nd John is written to a church body and it helps us to understand the practical aspects of ministry life, 3rd John is written to a person, helps us understand the practical aspects of relational life. In our study guide I referred to these books as case studies and maybe that's not something that's in our rhythm of life but maybe word problems. We can all remember being in school, having that math textbook that you would study and then you would apply it with word problems and we probably hated them. But you guys know that I've told you before I am a math girl. I love the science of math because it's so black and white, so right or wrong, there's no emotion, there's no argumentation on my kid's part as far as you know whether that answer is right or not, and they might try, but even though I enjoy those aspects of it, there's a tedium in learning it. There's a tedium in going over those rules, the Pythagorean theorem, the area, how to find an area of a triangle, the distributive property, unit multipliers, it's not easy. Those laws or those truths of math aren't easy and yet there comes an application and I bet you all of you can remember one time that you like all of a sudden applied the tedium of math. Maybe you were 13 and you were shopping and you were looking at sweaters and you saw that 30% off sign and you're like, oh percentages, fractions, I don't do that and then it came to you, wait, I can do this, like I know 10% at 25, that's 250, 30% is three of them, that's 750, the sweater is 25 minus 750, it's 1750, I have $18, I can buy the sweater, right? And you applied it and you were thrilled with yourself and then upset all at the same time because you had been telling your math teacher all along, why do I have to learn this, I'm never going to use it and you just proved yourself wrong because you used it. But the point of that is, is that hopefully today we are going to apply the truths that we have studied in the first part of our experience in 1st John. I want to begin with 2nd John and we're going to go back and forth just a little bit but they're very close proximity so you're going to be okay with that. There are four points that I want to make, I'll give you the four points, the first one will be the balance of truth and love, warnings of association, the blessings of hospitality and then we're going to end with face-to-face communication. So our first concept is the balance of truth and love, which is what I titled this week's session and as we start reading in 2nd John, I want you to pick up a note key in on the word truth as we read the first four verses. It starts,

So we decided in our study guide that we were going to take the elect lady and her children as a specific church body and not a woman and her children. It's not clear as you read this to do that and I suppose that there are some theologians that would take it differently but we just agreed that we're going to look at it this way that this is written to a church. I personally think it makes the most sense in the context of this letter and the shared vocabulary with other parts of the New Testament. So if you want to think differently that's just fine for today we're going to look at it this way. And John says that he loves them in the truth because they know the truth and because the truth abides in them. And he says he rejoices greatly to find some of their children walking in the truth. Now John has brought us through these kinds of phrases through first John first walking in the light what it looks like to be walking in the light. Walking in love what that looks like and now in both of these books we're going to be talking about walking in truth okay. And even though there's a and you probably noticed that verse four in both second John and third John are almost identical aren't they? He says I rejoice greatly to find some of your children walking in the truth. In the next book he's going to say I have no greater joy than to hear that my children are walking in the truth. Even though there's a heavy emphasis in these first four verses on truth as we read the next two verses we are going to quickly temper it with love. Let's read starting in verse five. He says

All right I see this balance expressed to us any set or I see this passage excuse me expressed to us the essential balance between truth and love. Between those two ideals of truth and love in our daily experience okay and John over and over in first John showed us that as we embrace the truth believe in the truth accept it into our hearts that it translates into a mutual love for one another that is then guarded by the truth itself. A believer that is all truth without love or a believer that is all love without truth is out of balance and ineffective. So I want to hang on this for just a little bit so that we can think it through. I'll use some real life situations a general sense of this concept and then we'll come back and apply it to our spiritual lives. You've probably observed in families that a mom and a dad may tend to polarize just a little bit and reflect two sides of the bear family. One may become the grizzly bear and the other may become the teddy bear and it doesn't follow gender lines. It's not always the woman that becomes the teddy bear and the man that's the grizzly bear but sometimes the there is one parent that expresses that strictness that abiding in truth if you will. This is the line we're going to tow it and another parent will express that love and softness and that sort of a thing right. In our personalities and in our spiritual lives you've probably also observed that some of us are compassion driven and a believer can be compassion driven to the point that they have left behind truth and doctrine or you may be wisdom driven and a believer can be truth and wisdom driven to the point that they forget long suffering and mercy right. Have you observed this? You can probably figure out which one I am and I figured out a lot of you too. In our study guide I quoted John Stott at the end of the last lesson and he said our love grows soft if it is not strengthened by truth and our truth grows hard if it is not softened by love. If you are tending to be the grizzly bear part of our body of Christ you need to soften yourself probably by surrounding yourself with a few teddy bears and if you know that you're the teddy bear you need friends who have the grizzly nature right. So we need to continue to work on a balance in our lives of truth and love. Truth and love cannot be separated. Love must yield the edges of truth and truth must reinforce love. Now once we affirm this, once we We absorb this, this mutual tension, now we can go on to verse 7 and we can look at this word problem that we have, this case study. And this is where we get into our second point, which is the warnings of association. Verse 7 says,

Now both of these letters are going to address hospitality of sorts. But it goes way beyond who we choose to invite to have for dinner. This letter is guiding the church into an understanding of who to accept, who to receive, who to endorse, okay? And the key word I think here is the word deceivers. John tells us that there's many of them. There's many that have gone out into the world. This isn't a limited few. Many deceivers have gone out into the world. So let's go through our normal process here and say, so what does the text say? What are the characteristics of deceivers? The text tells us that characteristics of deceivers are they do not confess the coming of Jesus Christ in the flesh. And they do not abide in the teaching of Christ. And we'll talk about that a little bit more in a minute. What is the potential harm? What does the text tell us? John says that you may lose what you have worked for. There's a great danger in becoming entangled with false teachers and probably everyone in this room has someone somewhere in your life that has become entangled in a false teaching, a bad ministry that was not abiding in the teachings of Christ. And as a result, something was lost. And it's a very sad thing. So that is the warning here. There's a danger in association with an endorsement of these people. John says taking part in his wicked works. There's a wickedness in altering who Jesus is. We don't want to associate with or endorse those that do that. How do we apply what we know about following Christ to a situation like this? What does the text say? John says do not receive them or give them any greeting. If it was the Apostle Paul, he often used words like have nothing to do with them. So that's what the text says. In plain English, that's what the words mean. Now we ask the question, what does the text mean? What did it mean for those people that first read that letter? Because their life was a little bit different than ours. For one thing, they were in a situation where the Roman road system was fairly new on the scene of human history. Never before had people been able to move so quickly to different parts and to travel and that sorts of thing. It wasn't just Paul and Silas and Paul and Barnabas that were out on missionary journeys. There was other people. Many deceivers have gone out into the world. And so for the churches, now there was a question of, oh, I need to, people are coming that I don't know. I don't know these people. And so now there was a question of who to receive, who to extend hospitality to, who to endorse, because people were sharing their philosophies of religious life from pure motives or from false. And so they had a responsibility as church leaders, who to receive, who to give their stamp of approval on. And John was saying, be careful, church, people are watching. You are setting a tone, you're setting an example. All right, what does it mean to me? Now, there are a lot of warnings in scriptures, and when we see a warning, we should process it and say, does that mean something to my life? And I want to tackle that answer from two points. Since this book is written to a church, first I want to tackle it from a church perspective. What does it mean to our church today? And it means that church leaders should be careful who they endorse, who they extend the right hand of fellowship to, and who they allow access to their flock. At Calvary Chapel, Ontario, that means that there is a great, there should be great caretaking in who comes to teach here, who we allow to come and do a concert, what video series we will use for the special things that we do, what books we have in our bookstore. There's a responsibility. For me and the other ladies on the women's ministry team, there's a great responsibility for what Bible study should we allow our women to have access to? Who are we going to grip hands with in doing that? It's probably one of the reasons that we've done these for five years, because it eliminates a lot of that. If I go south, you guys got way bigger problems than, you know, than that. But anyway, leaders love the flock by protecting them from people who are not walking in the truth. They're careful who they endorse, who they promote, and who they allow access to. So let's ask a couple questions. So does that mean we deny fellowship to people that we have doctrinal differences with? Well, not necessarily. We talked about this a few weeks ago, that there are different philosophies of ministries. There can be differences on teachings about baptism and end times and all kinds of those things that don't alter what John's talking about here, about Jesus Christ coming in the flesh. The point is altering Jesus. Do you have a different Jesus? That's the point. Also, does that mean we don't even extend greetings to unbelievers? Well, that's not what we're talking about, because they're not deceivers. Unbelievers don't believe, okay? They're not deceivers. Obviously, the church has a responsibility to be among unbelievers, to show them what Christ is like. So we're not talking about unbelievers. We're talking about deceivers. Does that make sense? So we're talking about people who do not abide in the teachings of Jesus. And this is a situation now where truth and love need to be applied simultaneously so that the flock will be protected in love from those who are not walking in the truth. This is important, super important, super relevant for our time. Now, what about every believer? We've been talking about church leaders. What about you as a believer? You're not leading a church. You're just a Christian. Well, still relevant. Whose books and blogs do you read and tell other people that you're reading them? Whose podcasts or videos do you listen to or watch and tell other people? Who do you quote on Instagram or on Facebook? Who do you endorse, even by purchasing things? Are you careful whose ministry you feed with your money? The bottom line is, we don't want to feed the ministry of someone who is not abiding in the teachings of Jesus. So we're going to take verses 12 and 13 that finish this chapter and throw them at the end because they're almost identical to the next book. So what I want to do here is turn the page, go on to 3 John and start this next postcard. And it begins this way. John says,

Beloved, it is a faithful thing that you do in all your efforts for these brothers, strangers as they are, who testify to your love before the church. You will do well to send them on their journey in a manner worthy of God, for they've gone out for the sake of the name, not their own name, for the sake of Christ, accepting nothing from the Gentiles. Therefore we ought to support people like these, that we may be fellow workers for the truth. All right. So in the last book, we talked about the warnings of association and this book, I want to call it the blessings of hospitality. The men mentioned in this letter, there's three men that are mentioned in this letter and the first one is to whom it was addressed to this Gaius and he's commended for his faithful assistance to those who have gone out for the sake of the name. So again, we're talking about traveling missionaries, those teachers who have gone out and John says that it's a faithful thing that you do, even though they were strangers to you. You didn't even know them. You didn't have to serve them. They were strangers and he commended Gaius for treating them in a manner worthy of God. In other words, you have served them as if they were God. themselves, and that is great. And he commended them from sparing these traveling ministers from having to accept hospitality from the Gentiles, which means the unbelievers. So I feel like the vocabulary and the tone give this distinct impression that this was more than a one-time occurrence, that Gaius was known for a ministry of hospitality, that this was his rhythm of life, was to be blessing those that came through, since there seemed this plural brothers. And I wish we had time to insert here a teaching on hospitality, because I always love when we can have a teaching on hospitality. But we've done it in other studies, we've done it in workshops, and that sort of a thing, and but just by way of reminder, hospitality is different than entertainment. Entertainment seeks to impress, and hospitality seeks to bless. Hospitality at its root has the word hospital, and so if we think to ourselves about the things that happen in a hospital, it is a place where people's physical needs are taken care of, where their emotional needs are taken care of, and that ultimately blesses their spiritual life. And our Christian hospitality may also bless their spiritual life. We can extend hospitality at any age, in any season of life, regardless of where we are, how much we have, how much we don't have, because there's only two things that are required for hospitality, and that is willingness and generosity. That is all that's required for us to be hospitable to someone. We need to have a willing heart, and we need to have the generosity to share what we do have, and not worry about what we don't have. There's an unlimited application for hospitality, and so I want to leave that for some rich discussion in your tables, because that's just a great way for us to encourage one another to be just like Gaius, and be showing hospitality to people that we do know, and people that we don't know. But what I need to do is go on, because John goes on, and he starts talking about someone now who was troubling the brothers, rather than blessing them. So in verse 9, John says, I've written something to the church, but Diotrephes, who likes to put himself first, does not acknowledge our authority. So if I come, I will bring up what he was doing, talking wicked nonsense against us, and not content with that, he refuses to welcome the brothers, and also stops those who want to, and puts them out of the church. Beloved, do not imitate evil, but imitate good. Whoever does good is from God. Whoever does evil has not seen God. All right, so in the same way that Gaius was commended for his faithful assistance and hospitality, now this Diotrephes is criticized. And how is he criticized? What does the text tell us? It says that he liked to put himself first. He was self-focused, rather than others focused. It says that he didn't acknowledge the Apostles authority, that he thought he knew better. John says that he was talking wicked nonsense against the Apostles, and in another translation that just may simply be worded as gossip, or talking about them. John says he refused to welcome the traveling brothers. In other words, he had an attitude that, hey, if this deal isn't going my way, if I don't believe in this ministry, I'm not supporting it. And then finally, he stopped anyone who actually wanted to help them, and he put them out of the church. So he was a bully. So we look at Diotrephes, and we think to ourselves, what a pill. He's so much trouble. Like, who would be like that? Who would ever be like that? Hmm. And then we have to go back through the list again, and say, have I ever wanted to put my ideas first? Check. Have I ever thought I knew better than the pastor? Well, I live with him. Of course I have thought I knew better than him. Check. Have I ever taken to gossiping or talking about another leader? Well, how would anyone know my idea is better if I don't fully explain it to them? Right? I'm getting all these little check marks. Have I ever decided, I'm just not going to support that ministry then, because I don't think they're doing it right. I don't know if I have or not, but the point is, we start going through that list and asking our questions, and rather than vilifying Diotrephes as if he's Judas himself, you know, we kind of go, oh, there's a little baby Diotrephes right in here. And that's good for us to read through that and to see our own vulnerability, our own potential to be like that. I think it's what John had in mind, because look what he said. He goes, beloved, do not imitate evil, but imitate good. I've said so many times that we disciple one another. We are discipled by our friends. We become like who we are around. So there's a great possibility for us to begin imitating people who we are around, who we associate with. So then what do you do in the church? Now we've got these two guys in the church, Gaius, Diotrephes. And so John has to make it clear. He says, don't imitate evil, but imitate what is good. Well, there's clearly great applications for us there. And then finally we have this man named Demetrius. And John says, he's received a good testimony from everyone, and from the truth itself. And we also add our testimony, and you know that our testimony is true. So to wrap this up, in this case study, John himself applied truth and love to this situation, and looked at Gaius, and he commended him for it, and encouraged him to continue the ministry. He looked at Diotrephes, and he exposed his selfish manner. And then he mentioned Demetrius, who may have been delivering this letter, and he was applauded for his good testimony. So was it loving of John to expose Diotrephes in that manner? Was that gossip, or was that walking in the truth? Sometimes love demands that the true nature of situations be uncovered. So what's important here, by way of example for us in this letter of 3rd John? Well, first of all, we see hospitality. Hospitality is commended specifically to those who are sharing in the ministry of the word, even if they are strangers. And this isn't earth-shattering news to us, is it? We see that self-centered dominance in the church is condemned. This comes from the evil one. John says, don't imitate evil. Again, not groundbreaking information. But there's another thing here that maybe is some, a line of thinking that we haven't thought about, and that is this, that the willingness of the author of this letter, Apostle Love One Another John, the willingness of him to love the church body by making a proper judgment and warning. Do we see the balance of truth and love in what he's doing in this letter? He made a judgment about the good and evil that he saw playing out. He wrote it down on parchment to last for generations and be in our biblical canon. It's like an experienced referee, John, seeing what was playing out on the field and calling the play as it happened. Truth and in love. So the last thing I want to use as a wrap-up is our point, face-to-face communication. And the last two verses in this book say, I had much to write to you, but I would rather not write with pen and ink. I hope to see you soon, and we'll talk face-to-face. The last two, or the last verse of the previous book, he said, almost identical. Though I have much to write to you, I would rather not use pen and ink. Instead, I hope to come to you, talk face-to-face, so that our joy may be complete. It's almost a silly topic to end on, face-to-face communication, and yet I feel like John has an inside track into our generation. When we have texted back and forth 15 times and finally say, you know what, let's just talk about this when we get together, right? Which is always wise. How many of you have gotten burned over the last decade with the communication that we have, where you sent a text and thought, I shouldn't have done that, or I wasn't clear. You go back and read it, and you thought, I didn't put any emojis in there. What is she, what is she thinking, you know? Or you, I am NOT an emoji girl, and I have a few young people in my life that just like, that freaks them out. Like what are you saying? I feel like you're yelling at me if you don't put a smiley face. So I've had to try and slow down and find, okay, how can I soften this? But the point is that, all I want to say about this is the wisdom and face-to-face communication. There is wisdom in whether you have to write a letter, a note, an email, a text. There comes a point when you just have to say, hey, let's talk about this because you get the softness of the body language and all of that kind of a thing. And so John had that dialed in 2,000 years ago. Bless your heart for understanding that. So just in summary, we have many situations in our life that require the balance of truth and love. And again, I just want to read what John Stott said, let your truth be softened by love and let your love be strengthened by truth. So that we can walk in the light, we can walk in love, and we can walk in the truth. Amen? Amen. Father, thank you for this whole series. Thank you for allowing these writings of your beloved apostle to be in our Bible, Lord, that we can learn so much and glean so much from them. And Lord, just in this one aspect of truth and love, I pray that you would help us, whatever side of middle we tend to be on in our personal lives, Lord, would you help us lead a balanced life to absorb truth and love and to be effective. Because like the apostle John, we are willing and able to walk in both of those aspects of life. Lord, I pray for our discussion groups tonight, or this morning, and I just pray, Lord God, that you would help us to further learn from one another as we discuss together. In Jesus' name. Amen.